Our Footprints burned into the snow
by Dusktop
Summary: Tanjiro had always been the big brother. Always caring about them, always looking out for them. Now it was her turn. She had to find him before it was too late and nothing was going to stop her. [Role reversal & canon divergence AU]
1. Chapter 1

She was on Tanjiro's back as he walked through the forest. His hair was plastered with snow, his breathing labored and though she couldn't see his face she could tell that he was barely staying awake.

"Brother?" she asked "Are you alright?"

His head perked up at the sound of her voice. "I'm fine Nezuko." his voice uneven as he took deep breaths "We're almost there. You're going to be alright."

He must be really tired to be saying weird stuff like that. She was with Tanjiro, of course she was going to be alright.

She snuggled up to him. "I just had a really scary dream." she murmured sleepily closing her eyes "There was a demon that attacked our house but then you scared it off."

"Oh really?" he made a weird choking sound as he spoke. "It... It must have been really scary Nezuko. Do you... remember anything else?"

"I think you fought the demon with the hatchet we have at home." she giggled quietly "Big scary demon scared off by a little human with an axe." she hummed in thought "Maybe we can make a snowman about it when we go back home."

She imagined that for a moment. Tanjirou, Takeo, Shigeru, Hanako and herself pelting a snow demon with snowballs and pebbles.

Tanjirou's shoulders began to shake. "Yeah" he croaked out "We can do that when go home."

She opened an eye "Are you alright brother? You sound sick."

He didn't answer as his shoulders kept shaking.

"Brother you're acting weird." she muttered "Are you alright?"

He sniffled "Nezuko?"

"Yeah?"

"I... You know I love you right?"

She opened both of her eyes again. Of course she knew that. Why was he acting so weird?

She opened her mouth to reply.

.

She woke up.

A dream. The dream.

The same dream that she had been having the last week.

She furiously wiped away her tears as she sat up. Stupid Nezuko. Why couldn't she dream about something else?

The door creaked as old man Saburo stepped in. "You awake Nezuko?"

She looked away giving him a quick nod.

He sighed. "Dream?"

Another nod.

"Go wait outside." he said already used to the routine "I'll go get some tea."

She waited until he left before heading outside and sitting down on the wooden terrace next to the house.

Old man Saburo lived about a quarter mile away from the village, making a living by creating parasols and furniture out of the wood he got by cutting down some of the nearby trees. His house while smaller than the one she used to live in had two rooms, a wooden terrace which she was sitting on now and a small heating system to keep the house warm during the winter.

It had been the place she'd been staying and recovering since the demon attacked.

She watched as Saburo came out and handed a steaming cup to her. "Are your bandages holding out?" he asked "Or do you need to get new ones."

She gently touched the right side of her abdomen and winced as a short spasm of pain shot through her. "The bandages are fine I think." she said "The wounds still hurts though."

"Of course it will." he sniffed as he took a sip of his tea "You were lucky to be alive. Those kind of things take more than a few weeks to heal."

A punctured liver and lung with a severe case of blood loss. The doctor had barely been able to save her and even then it had taken her two weeks to regain consciousness.

(If only Tanjirou had made it with her...)

Coming to think of it there was something she needed to ask Saburo.

"Saburo-san" she asked hesitantly "When... when my brother brought me here... before he... you know. Before he..." She trailed off unable to force the words out of her mouth.

Saburo slowly set the cup down. "Yes?" His voice was tense as he said the word.

"Did he... I was wondering if he... said anything?" She fidgeted with the edge of her kimino as she spoke. "I wanted to know if... I wanted to know what... his final moments were like"

Saburo he seemed to age ten years before her eyes. The moonlight cast shadow across his face making his wrinkles stand out, making him seem much older than he was and his eyes spoke of all the pain, regret and sadness he had experienced over the years.

"Are you sure you want to know Nezuko?" he asked "There really isn't much more than I told you."

"I have to know." she insisted. "This... this isn't something I can just avoid."

He exhaled slowly "Fair enough. What do you want to know exactly?"

"Everything" she said. She could tell he didn't want to say anything at all but like she said, this wasn't something she could avoid.

He stared at his cup for a moment.

"There isn't much to say" he finally said "Carrying you down the mountain while severly injured himself took a big toll on him." He closed his eyes "He came out of the woods carrying you on his back saying that a demon attacked your family and that you were the only one he could save." he glanced at her "He begged me to heal you and keep you safe you know? Made me promise up and down that I would look after you when he was gone, that I would-" he stopped suddenly

"What?" she asked "What did he say?"

"That's... between me and him brat." he looked away. "All you need to know is that even while bleeding out on the ground he prioritized you over himself."

"What's so important that he wouldn't want me to know?" she pressed on "Why won't you tell me about it?"

"Don't ask me that question Nezuko. I'm not going to tell you what it is. By the way-" he said ignoring her sounds of protest "One of the last things he told me was to give you this." He fished out something from his pocket and showed it to her.

Her voice died as she recognized the object in his hand.

"Said it was something that would look good on you." he muttered. "God knows why he only gave you one of them."

"It's not... That's not..." her throat thickened.

_'Look after them for me when I'm gone okay Nezuko?'_

Her eyesight blurred as she hugged the single hanafuda earing to her chest.

"That stupid idiotic... " she choked out as tears began to stream down her face

Saburo embraced her in a hug as she began to sob. "I miss him." she sobbed "I miss them. I... just... I miss them all..."

"And you'll always miss them." he murmured "Years later you'll still walk into a room wondering why they aren't there anymore"

He had a far off look on her face as he spoke on "But as time goes you'll find that they haven't left at all because family can't be torn apart so easily by something like a mere demon."

He began to pat her gently on the back as her sobs slowly dissolves into hiccups "It'll be hard but always remember that they'll always be with over you." he murmured "Stay strong Nezuko. For their sake as much as yours."

She couldn't remember when she fell asleep after that. But for the first time since her family had died she didn't wake up crying.

.

* * *

.

.

Notes

Tip for writing: Rewrite your work over and over again.

Notes while writing this fic: Showing grief is difficult.

My attempt at writing a role reversal fic that doesn't follow canon. (And so far I regret everything)

Reviews + comments on how to improve my writing/this fic will be appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm gonna rewrite this because I realized how much I rushed this chapter. There are a lot of parts that should have been shown but wasn't and some parts were the result of me shoving stuff into the story that simply didn't work. So... expect that late Nov.**

* * *

The beginning of spring had made the mountain look like a completely different place from when it was winter. The snkw had melted revealing patches of earth where grass had grown explosively. The trees were covered with green leaves and sometimes even flowers depending on their type.

It was beautiful.

But to her it would always be the place where she lost her family.  
It didn't seem right without the sound of Tanjiro and Takeo chopping wood,  
without the smell of mother making the next meal,  
without the sight of Hanako and Shigeru playing around between the trees,  
without the feeling of Rokuta on her back clutching on to her as she slept.

It just felt so empty without them. So she had avoided entering it entirely. To try and ignore the fact that they were all gone.

But today she had to go up the mountain because it was where they all were. Near the top of the mountain where the sunrise could be always seen.

She had go up to say goodbye.

"I avoided coming here until now." she began slowly "I don't exactly know why...

I think I did it because I thought it would mean that... that I was accepting that you were all gone. That I was alone now..."

She began picking at the grass. "I cried a lot at first you know? We went to sleep one day and when I woke up everyone was gone and I was the only one that survived because..." she gasped for breath. "Tanjiro kept me alive but..."

The wind blew through her hair gently. She had started to keep it in a loose ponytail since she had to cut it last month. She had thought of tying it back into a bun after it had grown back like before but it had reminded her too much of mother.

"It's... It's been three months by the way if you didn't know... it's the beginning of spring so spring flowers are going to start blooming. Maybe some daffodiles or dandelions will grow here. You always liked those Hanako."

She had loved making flower crowns with those. She'd once decided to make flower crowns for everyone in the village and they'd both spent all night finishing them. (Hanako had fallen asleep a quarter way through so she had to finish them on her own but it had been worth seeing the smile on her face afterwards.)

"I've been living with Saburo-san during that time and he's been helping me out a lot. He's actually really good at cooking so I've been learning a bit from him. He also taught me a bit wood carving and fishing too."

She paused.

"While he taught me those things we talked about family tradition and stuff and... I thought that it would be nice, it would be right if I kept our family's kagura dance tradition going. So I tried to do the dance on my own but... I remember what Tanjiro taught me but I couldn't complete the dance on my own. I couldn't even do the breathing technique properly like... it's just so hard!"

It hadn't really helped that Tanjiro completely sucked at teaching. Everything else he could do almost perfectly but trying to learn something from him was like trying to learn something from an over excited puppy.  
It was only because she'd basically grown up with him that she'd been able to make sense of anything he'd said.

"Saburo-san introduced me to a dancing tutor called Shen and even though she didn't know anything about our dance she was kind enough to teach me about finding a rhythm and getting your footing right and just stuff about dancing in general.

I've been learning from her these last two months and... she's a really nice person. I like learning from her and she said I was a really good at dancing and two days ago... she asked me if I wanted to follow her on a trip to Yoshiwara to learn from other famous teachers and... I said yes."

She closed her eyes.

"I leave tomorrow and if... if I do really well there I might get an apprenticeship and if that happens... I might not... it might become difficult for me to come back here..."

Guilt stabbed at her heart. Getting an apprenticeship would mean she would have be learning from a teacher almost every day until she became a master herself. It wouldn't be difficult for her to return, it would be almost impossible and from what Shen had told her she had a high chance of getting a apprenticeship.

"I'm leaving because... I really want to complete the fire god dance to carry it on and... because it hurts too much. I keep on forgetting that you're all gone and I just don't want that to happen anymore... I want to..." she looked down.

It was just too painful to keep on living in a place which constantly reminded her of the gaping hole in her heart. She wanted to stop hurting... even if it meant leaving the place she used to call

"So I... I decided to come here to say goodbye before I go." She stood up and bowed. "Thank you..." she choked out "Thank you for being my family. Thank you for being my parents. Thank you for being my siblings. Thank you. I'll complete the dance of the fire god and I'll make you proud... all of you."

The sunlight seemed to shine brighter for a moment and for a moment she imagined that they were all there, smiling. She hoped they were happy wherever they were. They all deserved it.

She looked at the graves one more time before turning and heading towards where Saburo-san was waiting.  
"Did you say everything you wanted to say?"

She shook her head as she wiped away some stray tears. "No. Not even close."

He patted her back. "Write them in your letters and I'll read them to the family when I come up here."

"Is it okay if I do this?" she asked "Just leave like this?"

"If it's good for you then yes." he turned and began steering her down the mountain. "They would want what's best for you Nezuko, don't feel guilty about wanting to move on."

She smiled and turned to hug him. "Thank you for looking after me Saburo-san."

"Just remember to those letters Nezuko" he said as he hugged her back "Don't let this old man feel lonely."

They went down the mountain.

"So what do you want to eat?" he asked "Since it's going to be our last dinner together lets celebrate."

"You should choose Saburo-san." she said "I'm okay with almost everything."

He snorted. "Nonsense. It's your special day. You should choose wha-" his eyes locked onto something and he stiffened.

She frowned and looked to where he was looking at. A young man who was wearing a mismatched haori and had a sword on his hip was standing in the middle of the forest.

"Saburo-san?" she nudged him gently "Do you know him?"

"He's not anyone imortant." he muttered as he grabbed her hand and began walking in a slightly quicker pace. "Come on Nezuko. Let's go before the sky gets dark."

* * *

She was in a strange place.

Everything seemed dark yet bright at the same time and if she strained her ears she could hear whispers echoing at the edge of her hearing.

What was this place?

"Sis!" A voiced echoed through the darkness.

That was Takeo's voice.

"Takeo?" she called out "Takeo!"

"Sis! You have to wake up!"

"Takeo!" she reached out blindly "Takeo where are you?"

"Sis! Big brother's in trouble! You have to help him!"

"Takeo!"

"Sis!" Takeo was suddenly in front of her "Wake up!"

She bolted upright breathing heavily.

She was back in Saburo's house.  
The darkness was gone. Takeo was gone.

What kind of dream was that?

She slowly slumped back into her sheets.

Takeo would have turned ten this year. She and Tanjiro had been planning to teach him the kagura dance this year. He would have loved being able to spend more time with them...

She was going to cry again wasn't she?

She buried her head in her pillow. Gods this was so annoying. Why did she always cry everytime she thought of anything remotely related to her family? (She knew why)

She wasn't going to fall asleep anytime soon. Maybe if Saburo was awake she could ask for some tea.

"-erous to let hi-"

She blinked as she heard voices coming from outside.

"-ill him quickly be-"

That was Saburo's voice. Who was he talking to at this time of night?  
She crawled out of her blankets and put her ear against the door.

"-estigate how where he learned it." The unknown voice was gentle but it had a certain edge to it. "The fact that he knows how to use the technique is troubling."

"His family sold charcoal for a living" Saburo voice sounded... tired for some reason "I don't know how he knew... whatever you said he used."

She knew this was a private conversation and she knew that she should probably go back to bed but her curiousity got the better and she cracked opened the door a fraction and saw Saburo talking to... the swordsman from the mountain?  
Who was he? Why was Saburo talking to him now?

"He was the kindest boy in the village." Saburo muttered. "The best son a parent could ask for, the best brother a sibling could have... he doesn't deserve this happening to him."

There was a bottle of sake next to him from which he poured two cups and offered one to the swordsman who accepted it without a word.

"Honest, hard working, caring, everyone in the village absoultely adored him." he picked up his own cup and emptied it in one shot "His family was poor so they would try and give him things for free but he'd always force them to take money in exchange."

The swordsman took a seat next to him and picked up his glass. "He seems like a nice person."

"The nicest. Everyone would buy charcoal from him even if they didn't need to and sneak his siblings treats behind his back because he wouldn't accept charity." he was on his third glass now. "He was the kind of person who made the whole village feel like a better place."

She frowned. They were talking about Tanjiro? Why were they talking about him?

"The girl you were with today was his little sister wasn't she?" the swordsman asked. "How is she?"

"She's getting better" she could hear a bit of pride in his voice as he spoke "She's a good girl, just like her brother. She's going to Yoshiwara tomorrow to get an apprenticeship there."

"Does she know?"

"No."Saburo's shoulder's sagged "She doesn't and if a god exists she never will. How do you think she'll react if she learns that her brother turned into a demon?"

The world slowed down as her brain caught up with what she just heard.

Tanjiro? He'd turned into a demon? But he was dead how could he...?

Unless he was never dead in the first place...

Tanjiro was... alive?

"She's going to know eventually." he said "Truths like those don't stay buried forever."

"It can and it will." Saburo emptied another glass "If she heard that her brother was alive she would have gone after him without a second thought and as a demon slayer you know how that would have ended up."

Demon slayer? There were so many things that she couldn't understand right now.

Saburo picked up the sake bottle but the swordsman grabbed his hand before he could pour himself another glass. Saburo struggled a bit trying to pry himself free from his grip but he eventually gave up and put the bottle back down with a sigh.

"I doubt she knows what you're looking for either so don't drag her into your world anymore than she already is Tomioka." Saburo said "She's not meant for that kind of stuff. It'll destroy her."

The swordsman stayed silent for a moment. "I understand." he stood up "Thank you for your time and insight Saburo-san. I'll be staying in the village until tomorrow if you need me."

"I won't" he muttered "Take care kid."

The swordsman, Tomioka gave a nod of ackowledgement before leaving.

* * *

She stared at the ceiling trying to make sense of what she had just heard.

Tanjiro...  
Tanjiro was alive but he was a demon...

Wait. Back to the beginning.

A demon had attacked her family.  
She and Tanjiro had been the only ones to survive.  
Tanjiro had carried her to safety.  
Then he'd run away and became a demon?

Tanjiro had told them about demons once. People who had lost their human memories and relied on human flesh for energy. They had inhuman strength in exchange for never being able to bathe in sunlight.

That meant that Tanjiro had become a demon after he had carried her to Saburo's house?

But that didn't make any sense. If that happened why did he leave in the first place?

Did he become a demon before he carried her to Saburo's house? If that happened then why didn't he... why wasn't she dead? Tanjiro had said that demons forgot their human memories so he wouldn't have remembered her.

...there was so much she didn't know.

One thing was clear though.

Tanjiro was alive.

She couldn't stop the smile from spreading on her face.  
Tanjiro was alive! He may be a demon but he was alive!

She had to find him.  
She didn't know where he was or how she could find him but she had to find him. He was her brother, she had to find him.

The swordsman, Tomioka. He had come to meet Saburo because of something Tanjiro had used. A technique. That meant he knew where Tanjiro had been. She could ask him about Tanjiro and then she'd start tracking him from there.  
It wasn't a solid proper plan but she'd figuire things out from there.

She'd have to.

* * *

She slipped out of the house early the next morning. She had brought her travel bag which was supposed to be used for her trip to Yoshiwara (there was no way she was going on that trip after what learning Tanjiro survived) and had left a note for Saburo saying her goodbyes (It mostly contained a rant about not telling her about Tanjiro, a sorry for leaving so suddenly and a thank you for looking after her.).  
It would have to be enough. She didn't have a lot of time before Saburo woke up so she had to hurry.

The Tomioka guy had said he would be in the village which probably meant he would be at an inn and since there wasn't a lot of them in the villa-

She stopped.

Tomioka was walking up the mountain towards her. That was... convenient.

Was he going to meet Saburo? Or maybe he was just going on a hike. Either way worked for her.

"Hello...? Tomioka-san?" she called out

He looked up and his eyes slightly narrowed as he stared at her.

"I... I heard what you said to Saburo-san and-"

"Your brother is a demon now." he cut in "The person you used to know is gone."

She stayed frozen where she was as he brushed past her.

That was it? He wasn't even going to listen to her.

"I.. you don't know that!" she shouted at his back "He's my brother! I know him!"

"You wouldn't be the first to say that." he didn't stop walking. "Starving demons will kill and eat their own family members without regard because they need the energy to survive. I've seen it countless times."

"But he didn't eat me! He carried me down the mountain to safety!"

"The transformation time varies from person from person to person. His must have taken longer. By now he'll be no different than any other demon."

"He's not... he won't... Tanjiro will never harm another person!"

"He won't?" He stopped and slowly looked back at her. "And what if I told you that he already has?"

Her blood seemed to freeze up. "...he has?"

"He fought twenty demon slayers-in-training and ripped apart over fourty demons before that." his eyes were cold as he looked down at her "I told you he's not the person you remember him as. He's a demon now Kamado, not your brother."

Her whole body felt numb. Tanjiro... big brother... fought over sixty people?

"He hasn't killed anyone yet but it's only a matter of time before he does." Tomioka turned his back to her and resumed walking up the mountain. "If you really care about your brother than stay home and let the demon slayers deal with him."

Panic swept over her. Deal with him? They were going to kill him?

"I'll find him before he kills anyone!" she reached out, grabbed onto his haori and pulled stopping his movement "I'll find him before that happens. I'll find him and I.. I'll find a way to cure him. I'll find a way to turn him back to human!"

For once his expression changed, showing genuine annoyance. "Let go. You don't know what you're talking about. A human who becomes a demon can never turn back. It's never been done before."

"I can do it!"

"You can't prove that."

"You can't prove that I won't be able to do it either!" she said through gritted teeth "Just... just give me a chance!"

He opened his mouth to probably rebuke what she was saying again but suddenly he stopped. "Where did you get that earring?"

She startled at the sudden question. "What?"

"The hanafuda earring. The one on your left earring." he repeated "Where did you get it?"

"Saburo-san said that my brother wanted me to have it..." she trailed of "Why? Did you see Tanjiro? Was he wearing the earring? How is-"

She yelped as he suddenly tugged his haori free from her grasp and she almost fell face first onto the ground from the sudden force.

He looked down at her silently, a strange look in his eyes.  
"There's a man who lives at Mount Sagiri." he said "Tell him that Giyu Tomioka sent you and convince him to teach you how to become a demon slayer. If you want to save your brother that's going to be your first step in helping him" he turned his back and began to walk away.

"Wait!" she called out "Why are you helping me all of a sudden?! When did you meet Tanjiro? What happened when you met him?"

He didn't stop walking but she thought she saw his right hand twitch "...that's none of your buisness."

His silouhette blurred and dissappeared and she was left staring at the small dust cloud that he had left behind.

What had happened between Tanjiro and that guy? Why did he suddenly decided to help her? And after asking her about her earring all of a sudden!

But she had a destination now. A goal. Go to Mount Sagiri and become a demon slayer.

A demon slayer... It made sense that she would have to become one. Since Tanjiro was a demon and since she'd be looking for him it was only natural that she would be running into other, more hostile demons. She'd have to know how to deal with them but could she do it? She'd never struck someone before...

She'd have to cross that bridge when she got there. Right now she had a mountain to get to.

* * *

She had been outside of her village before. She had been on trips with father, mother and Tanjiro to a nearby village to get some supplies which weren't sold in their village but this was the first time she was going out alone.

It had been scary before she knew demons existed now? It was absolutely terrifying.

She walked constantly, only taking short breaks when she needed a drink of water or something to eat.

Meals were eaten quickly. Two bento's, a couple of snacks and two water bottles were rationed so that they lasted over two days instead if two meals. Sleep was taken almost as quickly during the day and only in short naps.

The sounds of animals scurrying around in the forest made her jump at any turn and although she didn't run into any, she would sometimes hear wolves howling in the distance.

Her routine allowed her to travel quickly but it cost her a lot of stamina and by the third day she was absolutely exhausted. She needed sleep, a proper meal, a shower and even more sleep.  
(How had Tanjiro lasted so long? From her knowledge he had ran away with nothing but he had somehow lasted over three entire months!)

But by the third day, after recieving several instructions from the people in the villages she passed by she finally reached Mount Sagiri.

It wasn't an easy mountain to identfy partly because of the fact that it was in a mostly unpopulate region (she only found it because of the farmers that lived about a mile north from the mountain) but mostly because of the thick mist that shrouded the area.

She could barely see thr tree tops through the mist and the air was so humid that she felt like someome was constantly spraying her with water.

But now that she had arrived at the mountain she realized that she had no idea what to do next.

There was no sign that gave her directions, there were no people that lived in the area that she could ask for help. Did he live at the peak of the mountain? Did he live at the bottom? In the forest? Out of the forest?

...did he even exist in the first place?

It was possible.

It was more than just possible.

Tomioka could have just sent her here to get her out of the way. Maybe to give her a lesson on how difficult it was to survive out in the world.

Did she come out here for nothing?

She collapsed at the bottom of the tree and closed her eyes.  
She didn't have the will nor the energy to search the entire mountain for a man that probably didn't exist.

She had thought how strange it had been that Tomioka had changed his mind to helping het that quickly. It was because he never planned to.

She was miles away from the only place left she could call home with not enough food and water to last to the next day, lost in a misty mountain and seconds away from blacking out from exhaustion.

She was so done. She couldn't go on anymore.

_Crunch_

Her eyes snapped open.

She had lived her life in a forest her entire life and she recognized the sound of someone stepping on a branch.

She stood up and slowly looked around her surroundings.

"Hello?" she called out "Is somebody there?"

Silence

Her eyes darted back and forth among the trees looking to see if there was anyone hiding among the trees.  
It couldn't be a demon that made the noise. It was still afternoon, the sun was still up. Why was the person hiding?

She was about to give up and think that she had hallucinated hearing the sound when she spotted a boy who looked a few years younger than her peeking out from behind a tree trunk.

From what she could see he was wearing a light green yukata and had a fox mask hanging from his neck.

Why was he hiding from her? Was she shy?

"Hello?" she took a step towards him. "Hi. My name is-"

His eyes widened and he turned and ran.

"Hey wait!" She almost tripped over herself trying to chase after him.

"Wait up! I just.." she coughed as the toll of walking almost non-stop for several days began to hit her again.  
She needed sleep. She needed food. She...

If he lived in this mountain then he could confirm if this Urokodaki person existed. If he didn't, then she needed a place to rest for the night and she didn't have the energy to climb over a mountain to reach the nearest village. Either way she needed his help.

Just a little bit more...

She forced herself to begin running after the boy again.

He was ridiculously quick for his age and she had to push herself to the limit to even try and keep up when suddenly the mist parted and she found herself in a clearing with a small house in the middle.  
The boy she had been chasing was nowhere to be seen.

She hadn't seen this place before. Was this where he lived?

She staggered towards the door almost tripping over her own feet as she walked.

"Hello?" she knocked on the door "Is there -hah- is there anyone there?"

The door opened slightly and an old man wearing a tengu mask looked through the crack.

"Are you Sakonji Urokodaki?" she asked "My name is Kamado Nezuko an-"

"I know who you are" he cut in "and I have no intention of teaching you how to become a demon slayer."

He shut the door in her face.

That was it? He wasn't even going to give her a chance? He...

She knocked on the door again. "Wait! Why won't you teach me?"

"I have no intention of teaching someone with a death wish." his voice was muffled through the door "The goals you have are impossible to achieve. Curing demons can't be done."

"You don't know that!" she kicked the door out of frustration. "You don't know if it's really impossible, you don't know me, you don't know Tanjiro, you don't know anything!"

"I've been teaching demons slayers for over decades girl." he said "I know more about them than you do and someone like you won't be able to survive out there."

"He's my brother! You can't just tell me to let him be alone out there!"

"If he's lucky a demon slayer will kill him before he eats anyone and he'll be at peace."

"He's my brother!" she pounded her fists against the door "He's the kindest person in the world! He'll never eat anyone even if he's a demon and I have to find him because he's all alone out there and... and he's my brother!"

"Your arguement is weak. Repeating the fact that he's your brother won't help you convince me to help you on suicide mission."

"He's my brother." she repeated slamming both her fists into the door before slumping against it. "He's my brother and I'm going to find him no matter what happens and if you want to stop me... you're going to have to kill me."

She closed her eyes as black spots danced in her vision. Her legs felt like they were made out of jelly and she still hadn't caught her breath after running through the forest.

She was so tired right now. Just... so tired.

The door opened.

Urokodaki stepped out except this time he was holding two wooden swords. He walked passed her and stopped in the middle of the clearing with his back to her.

"You're willing to go after your brother even at the cost of your life." he turned around and faced her "Your brother... does he mean that much to you?"

She nodded "That... and so much more."

"...he's lucky to have you as a sister."

No... it was the other way around. Tanjiro was the one who had always looked after her. He was the one who made her into who she was now.

The big brother.

Always the big brother.

He threw one of the swords at her feet.  
"Pick the sword up." he commanded "You've convinced me that you won't give up without a fight so now convince me you can back up your words."

She was barely able to lift the sword off the ground. It was about the length of her arm and seemed to weigh a hundred pounds in her hands.

"Kamado Nezuko." he raised his own sword "If you manage to land a blow on me I will accept you as a student."

"Now?" she was barely able to lift her sword! I- I can barely stand."

"Demons do not wait for you to be ready!"

His foot shot out and struck her in the chest knocking her backwards and she fell on the floor wheezing for breath.

"Demons are not considerate or fair!"

She barely managed to roll out of the way as his sword smashed down where she had been a second before.

"If you are to achieve your goal you will have to face countless demons! All of which will do their best to try and eat you!"

She struggled to her feet ducking under a swing that would have knocked her head off.

"You will face death out there looking for your brother and make no mistake if you become my student you will face death here."

She dug her blade into the ground like a walking stick, trying to regain her footing.

"Show me Kamado." he pointed his blade at her "Show me you are more than just words"

He was crazy. Absolutely nuts. Bonkers gone. Senile?

But she didn't have a choice. It was the only way she had now to find Tanjiro.

She needed to do this. She needed to do this! She needed to do this!

This time when he attacked, instead of ducking out of the way she raised her sword and blocked.  
The strength of the blow knocked her back regardless but it she could sense his approval.

She had already pushed past her limit but she'd have to do it again.

She raised her sword and lunged towards him, aiming a stab at his chest.

He slapped away her sword with one hand and knocked her off her feet.

"Better! But too slow!"

Too slow... easy for him to say. He hadn't been traveling for three days straight on foot.

She deflected another blow from her right, ducked under a kick and swung her sword at his legs.  
Once again he blocked it effortlessly.

She grit her teeth in frustration. Swinging wildly wasn't going to help her. Urokodaki was quicker, stronger and more experienced than her.  
How could she overcome that huge gap between their abilities?

She inhaled sharply.

What could she use?

_'There's a breathing technique that let's you dance forever.'_

Something changed.

Her eyesight cleares and sharpened. Her pain and exhaustion seemed to fade away and strength seemed to return to her body.

What had happened? She had never experienced something like this before.

She saw Urokodaki's next strike coming and this time she actually managed to block it instead of barely deflecting it.

Everything seemed so slow.

_"Every movement has a rhythm. It has a purpose."_

She struck at his right, blocked a kick from her left and spun her sword swinging upwards.

She was smaller than him so she would need to get in close to be able to land a strike. Get within his reach. Where only she could strike.

Block, Strike left, Duck, Block, Strike right

There! An opening on his lower left. She stepped forward.

_"The dance of the Fire God is really difficult to do Nezuko" Tanjiro smiled at her "But I'm sure you'll be able to do it eventually. After all you're my little sister. You can do anything"_

She gasped for breath and her legs collapsed beneath her making her land face first into the ground.

She couldn't move. Her body wouldn't respond.

"Your body has reached it's limit."

She managed to look up at Urokodaki who didn't even look out of breath.

"On your journey here recklessly disregarded your body's need for rest and now you're paying the price." he told her "You won't be able to move again for a few more hours at the very least."

"No! I can still..." she tried to move her arms. "I can still move!"

"It's not a matter of will anymore." he said as he picked up her sword.

"No!" she protested. "I can still move!"

Stand up! Move! Her arms twitched. Move!

"I told you-"

"No!" she shouted desperately "I can get up! Just wait a minute... please!"

"Saying it over and over again won't make it true."

"No" her eyesight blurred "I can get up. I know I can."

She had to get up. Tanjiro was out there. She had to find him.

She felt tears trickle down her cheeks. "I can do it. Just give me another chance..."

She had failed.  
She'd never find Tanjiro.

She had failed.

She began to cry.

* * *

Greetings Urokodaki-sensei

Forgive me for not writing to you sooner but the recent events had distracted me and I was unable to write to you until now.

The first thing you should know is that Muzan Kibutsuji was sighted in a village a few miles south west from Mount Sagiri. While I doubt that he will surface again anytime soon I ask you to remain cautious.

The second thing is I met a dem a dang

I will detail the specifics of the events in another letter but in short while investigating the sightings of Muzan Kibutsuji I encountered the demon that was responsible for the break in at Mount Fujikasane and in short he saved my life.

Which brings me to the main reason I am writing this letter to you.

I met the demon's little sister who wishes to find him and turn him back to a human again.

She convinced me to lend her my help and in hopes that it would repay my debt to the demon I directed her to you.

I acknowledge that it was foolish decision and I know that you refused to teach any more students but as one of your students I ask that you give her a chance. I believe that she has potential.

I know that this is a selfish request so please forgive me. I will explain my reasoning in the next letter as well.

May this find you in good health and good spirits.  
I will write again soon.

Sincerely Giyu Tomioka

.

He looked down at the crying girl who had left everything to find her brother.

She had potential he could agree on that but so did all of them.

And none of them returned.

She would die if he didn't help her.

But she could also die if he did.

He didn't want to mourn anymore dead children.

_"He's my brother!"_

He closed his eyes.  
At times like these he wished he could be crueler. It would have made things so much easier.

"Kamado Nezuko..."

He knelt down and placed a hand on her head as she looked up at him through her tears.

"I accept you as my student."

He could only hope that he was good enough.

.

.

.

* * *

*Random Notes

-tips for writing: write your whole plot before you write

-Now we're on to canon territory! or atleast until I start to write Tanjiro's pov which is going to be 87.65 original work. (God that's going to suck)

-Changes on how breathing techniques work, expansions, world building will happen and some of them will collude with canon so if you want an explanation on why I did [insert-stuff-I-did] ask and I'll answer them

-companion fic will be created to show other people's pov so expect that.

-Ffnet doesn't like spaces between paragraphs for some reason so it might feel a bit off in certain places. I'll try and fix those later.

-next chapter is going to come out late. I won't be able to write again until mid Nov so I expect it to come out at mid Dec.

[Update 19/12/24]

Due to personal reasons expect few to no updates for at least one year. I will still be writing during that time though so expect mass updates when I get back.


	3. On a new years day

This is a bonus chapter of sorts I wrote because Christmas. Why not?

I'll eventually move it to another story and make a mini series out of them but until then...

Enjoi

.

* * *

"This seems extremely unsafe and unnesecary" she said as she tried not to slip on the ice.

"Nothing is unnecesay when you're preparing to confront a demon." Unlike her Urokodaki sensei had no problem walking around. "Your situational awareness is extremely lacking."

"And fighting on ice is supposed to help?" She muttered as she shifted her weight gently wincing as the ice cracked underneath her feet.

"Your environment can be your best ally or your worst enemy." He said as he raised his wooden sword towards her, a clear gesture for her to start. "A single mistake will cost you your life in battle and I will not have you die because you tripped on a stray rock."

She raised her own blade, a real one, and took a stance before launching herself towards him.

Urokodaki sensei blocked her first attack and she was almost knocked off her feet at the retaliating blow.

She took a step back and flinched as a loud crack sounded beneath her feet. Sensei, as merciful as always, pressed into the opening and she was forced to duck the first swing and parry the second one.

"Always be aware of your surroundings!" He barked as he aimed a stab towards her chest "Always know where you're standing and where you're going to stand!"

She grunted as she blocked another strike which would have broken a bone if it had landed and backed away again as another loud crack appeared on the ice beneath her.

"Do not back away Nezuko." He muttered as he circled around casually. "Do not retreat out of fear. Remember what you have learnt. Remember what you're fighting for and strike."

Breathe. Focus. Strike

She repeated the words in her head. She had 'technically' defeated her teacher before, she could do it again.. hopefully. She didn't want to fall into a freezing lake.

A feint to his head was followed by an attempt to strike his legs which was blocked by a swift parry and she engaged him with a series of quick slashes using her smaller frame to her advantage.

Her strength was her speed which could be best utilized if she was close to him... and if he wasn't so damn good.

She struck blow after blow, all of which were blocked almost effortlessly and frustration was starting to build up in her.

She was repeating patterns and she was getting nowhere. She needed to find a way to get under his gaurd.

The ice cracked underneath her again as she dodged another blow.

If only she wasn't on ice she could probably think of something to-

Oh.

She was on ice.

_They_ were on ice.

She stabbed towards his chest and when it got blocked she used Urokodaki's weight to push herself away from him.

If she was going to do this she needed some space.

"Are you planning something again?" He asked warily.

"Maybe" she responded cheekily. "It's not like I have any other way to beat you."

"This exercise is supposed to improve your swordsmanship Nezuko."

She raised her blade over her head and (hopefully) shifted into a stance. "It's improvement if it works."

She brought her blade as high above her head as she could and swung it down onto the ice hard.

The ice shattered and she yelped as she fell into the ice.

God damn it.

"What was your plan exactly?"

"We-weaken the ice b-b-beneath u-us and ma-make you f-fall into the i-i-ice using o-our weight dif-ference." She shivered.

She had taken cold baths before but the sudden shock was nothing compared to falling into the lake.

"A sound plan." He muttered. "Now what did you do wrong?"

She huddled closer to the bonfire. "Eve-verything?"

He nodded. "Indeed, everything. A sword is neither an axe nor is it a hammer. You cannot simply swing it with all your strength and hope it has the same effect, there are different techniques for that. Your position was too far away as well. Your attack would have done nothing but create a small hole between us and warn me about your plan. Subtelty is something you should learn."

"A-anything else?" She muttered.

He stared at her for a moment. "You also fell into the lake."

She scowled. "Thanks. I could tell."

"You are welcome."

_"You're the only one out of us who managed to fall into the ice on your own you know." _Kishi grinned as he appeared next to her._ "I think Sabito and Yamane even laughed a bit." _

"I'm very happy to know that you've all been laughing at me behind my back." She muttered before sneezing again.

Gods it was cold. Had she mentioned that she was cold? It was very very cold.

Urokodaki sensei stared at her before taking of his haori. "Cover your arms or back with this." He said as he handed it towards her.

"B-but tha- what about you?" She spluttered

"I didn't fall into a lake."

Her face flushed as she accepted the clothing and draped it over her back.

Things had changed so much in the span of an year.

She would have been celebrating by now if things had been normal. Every day on the new year her family had celebrated with a feast.

A new year, a new day.

They hadn't been poor but they had always been thankful for having each other.

Now one year later she was fighting an old man wearing a tengu mask on a sheet of ice while talking to ghosts in her spare time.

While she was happy that she had met Urokodaki sensei and everyone else she would probably still give them up in a heartbeat to turn back the clock and spend time with her family. (She just missed them so much.)

"It's past midnight." Urokodaki announed. "It's the start of a new year."

She stared at the flames blazing in the bonfire.

A new year, a new day.

A lot could change in one year.

She could change a lot in one year. She could get stronger in one year.

"Happy new year sensei."

"Happy new year Nezuko."

One more year.

Wait for me brother.

* * *

She knelt infront of the shrine and lit the wisteria insence.

Years ago her siblings had died here. Their murderer? A demon.

A demon had murdered her siblings and ripped the only family she had apart and yet...

Nobody believed her.  
They all told her that she had been imagining things because demons couldn't possibly exist. They were a myth, a legend. Told to scare children to make them behave when they were young.

They told her that Gyomei-san had been the one to kill her siblings.  
They told her that Gyomei-san was the murderer.

No matter what she said nobody believed her.

She had been five then.

She was fourteen now.  
And she still believed what she had seen then.

No matter how many times the other children made fun of her, no matter how many times the adults would tell her she was wrong, no matter how much evidence was stacked against her...

She couldn't believe that Gyomei-san had tried to kill her.

She just couldn't.

It was why she was here, back at the temple, praying.

They hadn't been connected by blood but they might as well have been. They had been everything to her.

She hoped that wherever they were they were happy.

She walked through the bare trees as she made her way back to the village. Dry leaves crunched beneath her feet and she shivered as a chilling breeze swept past her.  
While snow hadn't fallen yet it was still quite cold outside and frost could be seen on the leaves in the early morning.

** _Crack_ **

The sudden sound stopped her in her tracks.  
What was that?

** _Crack_ **

She had heard that a bear lived in the forest but it was the middle of the afternoon and she was on the east side if the forest. Far away from where the bear had last been seen. Had it traveled all the way here?

_ **Crack** _

She began to make her way back to the village more hurridly than before. If it really was a bear she should get away from here as fast as possible.  
Where was the sound coming from?

"m̵̼̥̍͊ȅ̴̞̞à̸͖̝͘t̸̗̟̚͝"

She froze as a low growl came from behind her.  
It was a human voice that spoke but after hearing the words every one of her senses were screaming at her to run.

She slowly turned her head and immediately wished she hadn't.

"h̵͈̍u̷̜͍̓m̷̹̗̾ā̷̦̼̕n̵̤̻̂̚ ̴̟̔͠m̸̢̈́ȅ̸̝͜ä̸̪́̑ẗ̸̬́́"

A 7 foot tall monster covered with white fur towered over her staring at her with obvious hunger. Its jaw which was bloody and filled with sharp teeth was dropping drool on to the floor and its red slitted eyes bore into her.

How did something so big sneak up onto her?

"h̵͈̍u̷̜͍̓m̷̹̗̾ā̷̦̼̕n̵̤̻̂̚ ̴̟̔͠m̸̢̈́ȅ̸̝͜ä̸̪́̑ẗ̸̬́́" it growled "**t̷͚̓̄͠a̵̻̅s̶͕̑ṱ̵̨̨͘y̵̼͆̅̕ ̷̡͈̌̿͜h̵̼̉u̶͂̎̃ͅm̷̤̑ä̸͇́̍̒ń̸̮͇̘͌ ̸͍̲̺̾̀m̴̜̙̜͐͝e̶̪͈͎̾ả̷̮́t̴̗̆̒͜**"

Demons were real. She was right.

Her legs gave away beneath her as she stared helplessly at the demon in front of her. She couldn't move. She couldn't speak.

She was going to die. Die the same way her siblings had. Killed by a demon.

She should be afraid.. she was afraid but...

she could also feel relief.

She had been right. Gyomei-san hadn't been the one who had killed everyone.  
Kind, warmhearted Gyomei-san who had taken care of them for years. Gyomei-san who had told them stories before they went to sleep, who had cried with them when they were feeling sad.

She was just so relieved that she could believe in herself again.

She watched as the demon raised a clawed hand to strike her down.

Maybe she would get to see her siblings ag-

The sound of a high pitched whistle shook her out of her stupor and it was only pure instinct that made her dive to the side making her narrowingly avoid something that whizzed past her and struck the demon.

The demon screamed as the projectile burried itself into its chest and moments after, something else followed, barreling into the demon almost as fast as the projectile before it.

They crashed through trees and she scrambled back, trying to avoid the carnage that they caused.

Trees toppled and the ground shook as the demon and its attacker grappled with one another, screaming and roaring as they attacked each other with fury.

She stared, stupified at the sight before common sense came to her and she started to crawl away from the battle that was ensuing.  
She wasn't going to die here. She had so much to do.

She still had to apologize to Gyomei-san.

She flinched as the demon screamed.

"N̷̙͓͇̂͝o̴̱͇̻͑o̶͙̽̇ơ̸̰͠!̴̰̥͖͆̈́͝ ̵̨̈́̑̔F̵̭̝͌͝o̴̧͇̯͘o̸͔͠d̷̤͍̪͝͠ ̴̦̲̔̏̈́i̶̫̩͐̈́ͅṣ̴͉̾͠ͅ ̶͇̝͍̒̆͝g̷̘̓́͊e̶̽͜t̷͈̂ț̵͙̰̑̚î̷̡ͅn̵̨͈̏̓ģ̷͖̓̄ ̵̗̯̠̉̌a̷͙̚͘w̷̱̘̪̌á̵̗y̶͉͌!̶̧̰͇͂̇͐ ̸̩̦̲̎̂̈Ẏ̶̞̳̞̈͝ò̴̤̻u̷̱̕ ̸̥̏̈w̵̨̭͍͊̉̃i̷̪̭̥̽͐̏l̵̞̪̺̊̊l̵̘̑̇ ̸̘̗͂̋̐ň̸̤̝̈̓o̶͎̲͛͆͝ṭ̸̦̃͜ ̵͚̈͝s̸̰̠̽̏t̶̥̪͌ǒ̶͇͖͙p̸͔͙̭̓ ̸̹̯̽̽͠m̸̬̼͛͛e̸̖̓͘͝ ̴̳͊f̵̦̍͝r̷̤̖̽̀o̴̜̩̩͑̋m̶̨͍̺̒ ̷̞̃ͅǧ̵͔͉͠ę̷̰͈ṭ̶͕̎͊t̴͉̹̆̅i̴̦̩̥̐̃̌n̷͙̽͗ğ̸̥̻̕ ̸͔͗͌m̵̖̒̕y̸͕͚͆̏͘ ̸̯̊̐̕f̴̢̟͆̿o̵͖̓͝ǒ̵̢̊̕d̷͙͔̉͝ͅ!̷̘̈̉!"

She looked behind her just as the demon knocked away its attacker and lunged, its razor sharp claws aimed towards her.

"**F̵̝̔̿̄̾̊̉̿̃͠o̶̧̨̗̻̯̱̼̜̲͒͗͆̿̀̾̇́͝ö̵̡̡̥̜̺̰̭́̾͜͠o̴̫̘̙̱̘̓̇̿͋̅̓͑̊̎͘o̸̰̙͕͒ǫ̶̼͇̟̯̖͓̔̐ȏ̵̧͊̑͐̕͝d̶̞̓̾̃͌͑̿̽̒̄̚**!"

And then the temperature plummeted.

She slowly opened her eyes and screamed as she saw one of the demons claws inches away from her face. She scrambled back and kicked the hand and-

.

.

cold

She blinked. The claw, the demon that had just been about to kill her was now frozen in place.

She slowly looked around.

Everything around her had also been frozen. It was now, along with the demon, a snowy white and she could she her breath dissipate in the cold air.

How? Who could?

She looked towards where the demon and... whatever it was fighting.

Nothing. The demon's opponent had dissappeared.

* * *

'Thank you'

He watched as the children faded away with something akin to envy.

If only he could disappear that easily.

"You could have eaten her you know."

He sat down next to temple and leaned against one of its walls.

Fighting the giant monkey shaped demon had been even more challenging than he had anticipated. He would need to find a way to fight larger opponents if he wanted to stand a chance in the future.

"She was a pretty thing, at the ripe age of fourteen too. Such a shame."

Get out of my head.

"You'll need to eat eventually if you want to survive Tanjiro. The demon you fought today was nowhere near the level of one of my lower moons. Sooner or less you'll have to ea-"

GET OUT!

He felt Muzan smile. "Eventually Kamado... Eventually"

He slowly unclenched his fists as he felt Muzan's presence fade from his mind.

For Nezuko.

He recited the words over and over again.

For Nezuko.  
For Nezuko.  
For Nezuko.  
For Nezuko.  
...

He sighed as he slumped against the wall.

He missed her. He missed them all.  
He wished he could...

No

Nezuko was safe. Safe and away from all this mess. She was safe and that was all that mattered.

For Nezuko.

He yawned and he closed his eyes.  
Maybe he could sleep for a litt-

_Caww_

His eyes snapped open and he spotted the crow just before it flew away.

Already?

He sniffed the air.  
A group slayers from the east and another group from the west.

Close. Too close.

He picked up his axe and strapped it to his back and began to run.

He could hear the shouts of the demon slayers behind him but he ignored them.

He snarled as he sensed another group of slayers from the front.

A trap. He hated traps.

"Well look at what we have here. A demon who uses a weapon!" The group that had been hiding emerged from the trees and slowly made a circle around him. "Tell me demon, who did you kill to get that axe?"

I'm not a killer.

"Not much of a talker eh? That's fine then." The slayer that was speaking spat at the ground before drawing his sword. "We'll just kill you and you'll atone for your crimes in hell."

He snarled as they slowly closed in on the him and he tightened his grip on his axe.

For Nezuko

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

For Nezuko

* * *

I've got a lot of personal stuff going and it's going to last a while so for one year expect little to no updates. Sorry

But I'll still be writing while I'm dark so expect mass updates when I'm back.

.

.

Also Almost forgot.

HAPPY NEW YEAR [INSERT SOMETHING RELATED TO HOLIDAYS HERE]


End file.
